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To get an idea of just how much remains unknown about an area that directly affects most people's lives, you need to drop in on the International Society for the Study of Women 's Sexual Health.

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Two inmates housed in a smoke-free prison traded a hostage for cigarettes after a six-hour standoff.  Billy Grubb, 32, and Bradley Johnson, 25, attacked the guard Monday night, said Howard Carlton, warden of the Northeast Correctional Complex.

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Athletes were involved as customers in an illicit steroid distribution network that led authorities to raid two Orlando pharmacies and arrest four company officials, a New York prosecutor said.

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The Mexican drug runner whose testimony sent two Border Patrol agents to prison for shooting him in the buttocks brought drugs into the United States more than once, thereby diminishing his credibility as a witness in the investigation, according to a California congressman.

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My respect for Glenn Beck just skyrocketed.

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If you thought LimeWire was dead, thanks to the RIAA, think again...

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Past two gates, about three miles from the highway, in a recently logged area, Michelle looked down and spotted something very strange.

What the Padigo's say they encountered was more than three dozen huge footprints spread out over a hundred yards or more.

All of the suspects are from the Galilee town of Bir al-Maksur, a Beduin village near the Hamovil Junction. The last of the four known rapes was carried out in a forested area just outside of the village.  The first attack occurred in April 2005, when a 13-year-old girl was raped at the Zevulun Beach in Kiryat Yam. In December of that year, a 19-year-old soldier was kidnapped and raped just outside of Kiryat Ata.

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U.S Border Patrol agents have begun putting the clamps on scores of undocumented aliens who attempt to leave this country illegally. The exodus is a recent phenomenon, and one that is causing a good deal of concern.

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People who bought wine at the store were also more likely to buy more olives, fruits and vegetables, fish, lean meats and dairy products than beer consumers did, said the study. Beer buyers were more likely to buy frozen dinners, cold cuts, pork, mutton, crisps, sugary products, butter, margarine and soft drinks.

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“I personally find the word 'alien' offensive when applied to individuals, especially to children," said Sen. Frederica Wilson, D-Miami. "An alien to me is someone from out of space."

"If you're slow, it'll take you three seconds. You can really do it in one," Mr van Rensburg's former business partner Roelf Mulder told the AFP news agency.

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  A South Carolina farm wife called the local phone company to report that her telephone failed to ring when her friends called - and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her dog always moaned right before the phone rang.

The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile lady.  He climbed a telephone pole, hooked in his test set and dialed the subscriber's house.

The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned and the telephone began to ring.  Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found:

1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel chain and collar.

2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.

3. The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the number was called.

4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate.

5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring... which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and moaning.

Clemons felt he was unfairly labeled in our report as a deadbeat dad and showed us documents indicating he has been paying child support to his daughter and her mother some $300 monthly.

“The fact is I am paying my child support,” he said. “Every two weeks out of my check. She’s got full medical and dental and she’s on my life insurance policy. How am I a deadbeat dad?”

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Boston Celtics radio analyst Cedric Maxwell will offer an on-air apology during Wednesday night's game for saying that a female referee should "go back to the kitchen" after he disagreed with one of her calls, a station official said.

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Now, I must admit to not carrying a stopwatch at the time, so this is unscientific, but the total elapsed time from sharing a portion of my political ideology with a “true” conservative and being consequently branded a liberal was approximately . . . 12 seconds.

Taliban spokesman Mullah Hayat Khan told a reporter, “We wanted to target… Cheney.”

We applaud the Taliban’s honesty, but question their judgment in this instance. The bombing will put enormous pressure on Musharraf to act and also paves the way for a U.S. attack into Pakistan. We did some polling and discovered some other examples of questionable decision-making on the part of Taliban officials.

Here are the “Top 9 Other Errors In Judgment By The Taliban.”

9. Moving a significant portion of their money out of opium production and investing it in Air America.

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Enjoy!

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In the column, AsianWeek regular contributor Kenneth Eng listed "reasons" to discriminate against African Americans. The piece has been pulled from the newspaper's Web site, but the print edition of the free paper, owned by the politically influential Fang family, was still available in news racks Monday

Some religious leaders in the Bajaur and Malakand agencies are telling the people not to get their children vaccinated since the practice is un-Islamic, and that those that die of polio would be considered martyrs

Incredible.

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Communist leaders have no plans to allow democracy in the near future because they must focus on economic development before political reform, China's No. 3 leader said in comments published Tuesday

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Opponents say they will continue to fight what they term a movement to make Maryland a "sanctuary state" for those who are in the country illegally.

"What we are doing is rewarding and providing benefits for people who broke the law," said Del. Patrick L. McDonough, a Republican from BaltimoreCounty who has sponsored a bill that would make English the official language of his jurisdiction.

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Its critics call it incendiary. Norah Sarsour, a Palestinian-American student at U.C.L.A., said it was disheartening to see “a film like this that takes the people who have hijacked the religion and focuses on them.”

Huh??

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“Though the president may have lost the country on the issues of the day, rumors of his demise among Republicans voters and lawmakers are greatly exaggerated.”

Remarkable, isn't it? And actually somewhat subtle. It's the last line of the piece, but the entire purpose of the piece. The sentence states that the president has lost the country, but not Republican voters. Which can only be interpreted as Republican voters no longer being part of said "country."

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A former AlamedaCounty mental-health worker was sentenced today to five years' probation and ordered to perform community service for being an accessory in an attack in which a teenager slashed the throat of a 75-year-old Berkeley woman.

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Palestinians: 'Looting and burning' of Jewish holy sites 'was a great joy'

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Michael A. Burman, 35, of Oshkosh, is charged with 10 counts of sexual assault of a student by school staff and 10 counts of child enticement. He was scheduled to make an initial court appearance Monday, but his appearance was delayed until today because his attorney could not attend court on Monday.

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The thief had the bank-robbing part down, putting his finger in his pocket to simulate a gun at a northeast Nevada bank on Tuesday. It was the getaway that proved a bit more difficult.

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If gays, lesbians and polygamists can live the way they see fit, why can't incest be allowed?  Hey... it must be ok.  France, Belgium and Holland already legalized inbreeding...

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